Our Declaration of Independence says life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are our God-given rights, and yet we make many choices today that seem to invalidate that claim. Our government isn’t exactly protecting these rights any more either, but that’s another topic for another day. For now, let’s talk about what this means for families and for education.
Most of us would agree when talking about college, careers, and life choices, that happiness/success would probably be found in the intersection of vocation/mission/calling, skill, passion, and affordability (college)/opportunity and marketability (jobs).
Taking for granted that college is an essential affects so much of our choices and the way we shepherd our children toward independence and adulthood.
And yet today in our colleges, we have hypersexualized and Academic and intellectual freedom are being squashed. neither are adjunct faculty. Student debt in this country is at a staggering 1.2 trillion dollars.
Where’s the liberty when one is a slave to debt? And what about the lives put on hold — including marriage and family — because of it? How can the youth become our future leaders and straighten our economic woes, when they can’t even get a grip on their finances?
Is college really all worth it?
Like many, I grew up hearing that you wouldn’t amount to much unless you got a college degree, at least. Our family is still somewhat entrenched in that thinking, though with one graduate, one in college, and one taking college courses for dual credit, we have so far not incurred debt, thank God. Our older kids have managed to get by with the little we had saved, some gift money from grandparents, and scholarships. Co-op jobs have helped a lot, too. We’ve shifted goals a bit such that going to a prestigious university isn’t a priority, and we’ve chosen to send them to local colleges/universities where they can still fulfill their calling, pursue their passion, work on skills they already have, and find jobs that incorporate those. We’re hoping to continue the debt-free plan with our two youngest.
We’re looking around at our children’s peers though, and while there are some who may be considered successful by the world’s standards, many are also floundering.
Building up our children’s fortitude is doable. As the parent of a young adult, I’m learning to stop giving advice when I’m not asked, to just listen and let her handle things her way. Though I often wish I could spare my child any suffering, there are hurts she’ll just have to go through on her own. The healing is hers as well. Figuring out her mission in life and becoming mature in her faith require a growing openness to the Cross. We want healthy adults who can stand on their own, so we take on the bittersweet task of letting go.
No utopia awaits them on this earth, but if they know to take recourse first and foremost in prayer, Scripture and the Sacraments, they (and we parents) can find peace even in the midst of chaos. When they’ve learned to listen to God’s voice and align their will with His, they can make mistakes here and there without doing major damage to themselves or others.
When it comes to debt however, being completely hands-off is folly, especially since that’s the path so many have fallen on before.
There are new and interesting (lower-cost) programs out there, like Praxis. For Catholics, there’s Via Nova (undergrad) and St. John Institute (graduate). (I am looking for others, so please do leave a comment if you have suggestions.) Trade schools and apprenticeships deserve a serious/second look. And of course, there are online degrees available, though I don’t yet know much about them to make a judgment one way or another.
College demands that students learn time management, get along with a greater diversity of people, get used to professors and teaching styles, adjust to living away from home and family. The college experience is taxing enough without the additional concerns of crippling debt, among others. No wonder so many are on the verge of mental and emotional breakdowns.
There are practical and spiritual reasons for taking the road less traveled. Instead of feeding the current system which in many ways isn’t working anymore, perhaps we can help our children approach that intersection of vocation-passion-skill-affordability with greater intention and purpose, by looking beyond the dominant paradigm. Whether our young adults choose to attend traditional university or not, whether or not they choose to work for someone or start their own businesses, neither college nor career should become totalizing environments that enslave their time and their pockets, and devour their very lives. Our bodies may need feeding, but so do our souls.
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